Don’t stare at money too long, it’s Medusa - Ye

week 31

alright

i missed the newsletter for two weeks.

because i forgot it exists.

i was just buried.

the last two three weeks were chaos in motion.

new ideas showed up out of nowhere. old ideas that i was excited about just… died. some things flopped instantly.

a lot happened. fast.

so yeah, the newsletter slipped.

keeping this simple because my head is literally exploding and i do not have the energy to be poetic today

Also, I don’t have the energy to write the whole article myself, so I’m just speaking this shit out and you know, I’m trying to tell the AI to rephrase whatever I’m saying. So there’s that. So if you feel the article is very small and weird, just read that shit, bro. I’m tired.

Mentor Edge

so here’s what happened.

i got a mail from my college about internship opportunities. they were looking for developers.

and i was like yeah that’s me.

i went for the interview. got selected.

i met the Pro Vice Chancellor of the college. now i am working under him.

which is honestly kind of crazy. pretty cool. not something i expected randomly on a normal week.

but here’s the other side.

my life before this was simple.

i would work on projects. sometimes intensely. sometimes at my own pace.

now it is different.

now i have to show up. almost every hour of the day is structured. i have to work hard whether i feel like it or not.

but i am working with really smart people. making real connections. getting access to real facilities. real exposure.

and honestly it feels earned.

for the skills i built. for the effort i put in.

B.A.R.F

if you remember that scene from Spider Man where Tony Stark is standing inside that hologram setup moving things around in 3D especially the part where he talks about his father

like this

in college there is a team trying to build something like that not holograms obviously we are not there yet

but something inside a 3D space

a model you can walk through interact with observe from every angle

we did a lot of research and by a lot i mean hours of reading, watching, testing

the closest practical answer right now

VR

we are facing problems from every direction technical limitations hardware constraints design confusion execution gaps

i genuinely do not know if this project will fully work

but that is not even the best part

the best part is the people

i am working under really sharp minds i am learning more in weeks than i expected to learn in months

and somewhere in the middle of all this i started getting interested in research

i never knew writing a research paper could be this approachable it always felt like some locked academic thing but it is not

it is just structured curiosity

and i have a lot of curiosity

i want to explore it properly

maybe next week if i get time i will write a full article on my website

breaking down everything what we are building what we learned what is possible what is not

because honestly

this project is kind of crazy

and i want to document it properly

No More Bus Buddy

yeah my mouth hurts, i didn’t find bus buddy idea fitting for multiple reasons mainly the team issue & my time commitment, i might work on this idea later because execution was a big problem here not the idea itself

Side Projects

One other thing, I really wanted to work on a digicam. I use this iPhone’s digicam. I wanna make it that for myself. And I’m just making a mobile app, that’s it. I’m sorry, it’s very small and all, my newsletter. It’s just I’m really really tired, but i am just trying to show up

Free part

right now i am confused in a very loud way

i started going to the gym in january and now everything feels intense

there are two stories in my head

story one

i am not actually working that hard i already know most of the things i am doing the work is not some alien thing i have been doing similar stuff for years

so maybe this is just mental

maybe i think i am overloaded just because i cannot sit in my room and scroll for an hour

maybe i am dramatizing it

story two

maybe i am actually pushing too hard

maybe i am not letting myself breathe not letting myself chill not forgiving myself for being tired

maybe i deserve more rest than i allow maybe i am trying to squeeze improvement out of every second

and i do not know which one is true

am i lazy and overthinking or am i genuinely exhausted

today my head hurt so much i skipped the gym

and that alone made me question everything

am i locked in or am i burning out

should i accept that this phase is intense that being locked in is normal

or should i slow down before i snap

i do not have the answer

i just know that i cannot have everything perfectly balanced

but yeah today it was tired shrit

mb for that gang until then next time

mua shriut